There is great risk in living a double life, especially when you choose to live it out in the digital world.
When doing so, your identity becomes the one thing that must be protected.
Most blackmail victims believe they are protecting it.
What they do not realize is that blackmailers are skilled manipulators. They are experts at pulling little pieces of identifying information from conversations.
One detail here.
One detail there.
A mobile number.
A city.
A job title.
A social media account.
Eventually, the pieces come together.
One client was a crossdresser searching online for like-minded individuals and hoping to build friendships with people who shared his interests.
He made the mistake of trusting too quickly.
Before confirming whether the new friend was real or not, he shared personal information that helped identify him.
That mistake led to pure human panic.
The moment the threats started, all he could think about was exposure.
His family.
His reputation.
His private life becoming public.
People who have never experienced blackmail often underestimate the emotional impact.
Fear takes over fast.
My first job is usually not dealing with the blackmailer.
My first job is calming the victim and showing them there is a way out that does not involve losing everything.
Then I step in.
I take over communications, face the threat head on, work to prevent exposure, and help keep private matters from becoming public disasters.
Frank M. Ahearn is the author of: